Red Flag: Carlisle Cullen
by selinnium
Summary: In the 1600s, Carlisle Cullen was bitten and reborn. Disgust at himself caused him to resist blood but will it last forever? Telling of the difficult time our favorite doctor went through. One shot. Disclaimer: All rights reserved to Ms. Meyer.


_A/N – Yippee first published story(but not my first story to be written) but still… You might not understand the story entirely but try your best. Read on.

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**Red Flag: Carlisle Cullen**

**by Selinnium**

The pain, it was unbearable. I screamed and howled in pain. So this was how hell felt like; feeling of eternal, undying internal fire. Why wouldn't it stop? What is happening? What did I do to deserve such a painful afterlife? I was good, I swear. I was trying to stop the devil's creations, the demons from hell that had escaped. Or was that a sin as well? Oh lord, the burning.

_STOP__ IT!_

The pain lasted for a little more than an eternity. But it eventually stopped. Did I somehow achieve salvation? Or was that really the end of time, the length of eternity? What was that strange feeling tugging at my mind? It was so difficult to describe. It bothered me yet no matter how I tried, I couldn't either forget about it or figure it out. Hunger? No, I did not feel hungry. Subconscious insaneness perhaps? Cannot be, why did the thought even enter my head. Besides, I was quite sure there were no such illness. But I can't seem to think clearly either.

_What have I become?_

I knew I was still alive, even a bit more than alive. I felt different, I could sense my surroundings and describe them without mistake. It smelled like rotting potatoes. Improbable that they had those in heaven. Another scent floated and lingered within my nostrils. It was familiar yet I couldn't place it; sweet yet salty, rusty yet tasty and tempting to… to what? This was driving me crazy, in every possible sense. I felt like my very blood vessels itched and burned at the smell.

I stood up effortlessly, which was odd since I seemed to be out of it for a long time, and looked at my surroundings. It was dark but a thin streak of light shone through. It must have been midmorning or early afternoon. I heard the almost empty street. It was definitely Sunday morning; people were hurrying about towards the general church area. I walked out into the light when I was certain nobody would see me. Scents, sounds, sights; my senses worked in overtime. I looked at my hands and arms, they were sparkling like a thousand jewels in the sun reflecting like at every angle. I was fortunate I chose to come out when nobody was around. I ran in the direction of the woods and I felt a strong breeze in my direction. Why did I feel so non-human? And why am I moving so fast?

_Oh god__…_

Memories hit me hard. We were hunting a coven of vampires in the filthy sewers of London. One of them got to me and while in the process of sucking me dry, he was interrupted and I became a devil's creature. No… I'm not evil… I refused to give in to the thought. I sat down by a big, shady tree and remembered the sweet smell I came upon in the potato cellar. My mouth became moist with a foul, acidic liquid. Venom. So this was what I had become, a vampire. Hunter of the dark and cruel murderer of the innocent. Even though I understood they killed for self preservation, I refused to murder for my own survival. It would be plain selfish.

_I could kill__ myself… no, killing is a sin! But I already am an evil creature that will murder more people if I were to live. Besides, I am already damned. Yes, it is for the greater good._

I grabbed the short knife I carried with me, took a deep breath and I shoved it into my non-beating heart. Pain? No. Death and darkness? Not at all. I wondered what had happened, or, rather, what did not happen.

_It broke… my blade broke._

I was almost hysterical. If a sharp blade of steel was unable to harm me, what could? Since, then I had tried other methods of suicide. Starvation was obviously done in vain as I did not need food anyhow. Drowning? I did not have to breathe. Even throwing myself off a cliff was useless as I healed so quickly. But it hurt a damn lot.

After those experiences, I realized nothing can kill me. I found out later that werewolves were the natural enemies of vampires and they destroy every vampire they could get their paws on, how ironic. We used to hunt "sinful" werewolves as much as the "evil" vampires. Huh, instead the werewolves protect the human population from us dangerous creatures.

I was getting pretty weak and desperate from my resistance to hunt. Even the whiff of the scent of a far off hunter would send me into a frenzy. Fortunately it was faint; they did not come by to my area often. I debated between self preservation and morality. I made a choice.

_I won't drink blood. I refuse to murder for my __own sake._

Temptation was too great where humans could innocently stumble onto. I moved into a remote cave. It was deep, dark and morbid. It was a perfect way to live down the rest of my days without blood. Hopefully it would a very short number.

Three weeks. Why was I still alive? Why do I keep on existing? Was I truly immortal and able to suffer forever in bloodlust? I was almost willing to go into town at night and feed.

_So__. Extremely. Painful. No, must resist, must remain humane…_

Four weeks. I couldn't go on. The walls of my cave were damage by my hitting them from the fury of my bloodlust. I destroyed the trees in my way as I ran with top vampire speed through the woods for at least a hundred times trying to cool my head. I was starting to lose hope. Maybe if stopped being so stubborn…

_Deer!_

Too agonized to know what I was doing, I tore the gentle animal's neck apart revealing the blood vessels. Hot flowing blood flowed from the broken artery. Venom leaked from my mouth. I buried my face into the soft yet bloody fur. The smell was different from those of a human's but with equal appeal to me.

_Blood… sweet blood…_

I drank and sucked it dry. I could feel its blood circulating throughout my body. Euphoria rushed through my body. I was not the least bit satisfied but I at least I could think clearly then. The rest of the herd of deer ran off. I used my vampire speed, caught up with them, killed each of them carefully not spilling blood and feasted. I was bursting with blood from all thirteen deer. Energy coursed through me, my thoughts and senses turned incredibly sharp and refined.

I had an epiphany; I need _blood_ to survive, but not _human_ blood. How stupid of me not to realize it before. It was the simplest concept.

I grinned to myself. My flag is officially stained red but the meaning will never be the same. In fact…

_I don't need them!_

Next step: civilization.

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_A/N – Did you finish? Yes? cheers I hope you liked it. I'm not exactly brilliant but am I passable? I hope the grammar and all that is okay. I spent a lot of time on that aspect too. _

_If you didn't really understand how the "Red Flag" title fits into it all, I'll explain. The band Billy Talent has a song by that name. I was listening to the song one night and the idea just popped into my head. What inspired the whole thing __are the parts of the lyrics that said "The red flag waving never meant the same" and "We don't need them". The "red" just immediately reminded me of blood and "we don't need them" reminded me of Carlisle when he realized that vampires don't necessarily need human blood. I hope it makes sense now. Eh, long note here… I tend to ramble on about nothing important._

_Please take the time to honor me with reviews, whether good or bad. Thank you all!_

_Selena_


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